STRUNG UP

[Just shan't keep it any more ... ]

How long, they ask, is a piece of string?
I don't know - I haven't measured the thing.
I only can tell (with a brief muttered curse)
That string is a thing completely perverse.
I've a bag full of string scraps, some large and some small,
And none of them ever seem useful at all.
Be my parcel all bulging, all fat or all thin,
I never have quite the correct length of string.
This bit is too short and that needs to be finer,
And that piece could anchor a great ocean liner.
Then I find the right length and I tie a neat knot,
And I tighten it neatly, and then - just guess what!
My piece of string breaks with a loud, gloating TWANG,
And I'm back with my parcel just where I began.
So don't talk to me about pieces of string:
I abandon, abjure and renounce the whole thing.
I'll throw out my string-bag, tied tight at the nape,
And I'll do up my parcels with nice, sticky tape.
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