ST. VALENTINE'S TALE

[The onset of Spring ... ]

1. St. Valentine, a priestly chap
Sadly, lost his head:
The Romans cut it off, you see,
Which left the Bishop dead.
It seems most odd, a jest by God,
That this decapitation
Made Valentine the Patron Saint
Of mortal procreation.

2. The year two-seventy, it was,
When Bishop Val was shortened,
With all Eternity to spend
In thinking - what he oughtn't.
In mortal life, he'd had no wife:
His ways were solitary,
So up on High, he thought he'd try
To make all lovers merry.

3. He's seen fashion mirror passion
All through the Lovers' years,
(And farthingales and bustles
Very nearly brought him tears!)
But his feast shows how well he knows
The human urge for courting
Has never ceased: the human beast
Is always ripe for sporting.

4. St. Valentine has kept his fame
For near two thousand years.
He's supervised the mating game
From laughter through to tears.
But humankind should bear in mind
When frolicking in bed,
Just what became of Valentine -
The Saint who lost his head ...
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