THE DATING GAME

[Well-known facts]

Eve had an Apple when Eden was begun:
It was an Apple Mackintosh, a very early one.
It was not quite user-friendly, and Eve didn't fancy risks,
So her ports were kept in order and she formatted her discs.
Adam had a Modem, and he surfed the Internet:
Scanning through the softwear to select what he could get.
He got on line with Eve and thought: "These form letters are female!"
So he sent a friendly Fax which read: "Come up and see my E-Mail!"

The Serpent, who was cunning, introduced a nasty virus
Into Adam's mainframe, which turned Adam on “Desirous“.
He hacked Eve's P.C. Apple till her bytes had all been bitten,
And he formatted a disc on which his mailmerge could be written.
Eve escaped from Adam through the paths of Paradise:
He said: "Come, search, select with me, for editing is nice!"
He longed to scan her index, for her database was cute,
And her spreadsheets were inviting, but her screen was resolute.

The Serpent, who was dossing underneath the Knowledge Tree,
Sneered: "By number-crunching, I'll turn one and one to three!"
He clicked his mouse on "File Save": the file he saved was "Sin",
And he said: "They can't delete it when the Devil clicks it in!"
Adam wrote a programme, extra sound-bytes to obtain,
But his hard disc got corrupted when he started raising Cain.
Eve got a glitch upon her major input cable,
And when she scrolled the disc right through, the glitch she found was Abel.

The Lord was very angry when he saw them interface:
He sent Adam and his Modem crashing into Outer Space!
Then he flung Eve, with her Apple, just as far as he could boot her,
And human ills, for evermore, are blamed on the Computer.
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